just fine

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Posts by just fine

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  19

  shunning within the family.

  by bigmac in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm giving 3 examples of this practice--that i know of personally.. .

  my first wife--born in--divorced me over 30 years ago.

  she totally shuns our son--now 38--d/f'd and now happily married and enjoying life to the max.. my pioneer partner--from the mid 60's-----he totally shuns his daughter---to the point of even ignoring her in the street.. a close friend of mine--in the 60's and 70's-----i was best man at his wedding.

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  just fine

  I am running into this right now. I left many years ago and was never DF. But now a relative of mine is DF and I won't be a part of the shunning. This has infuriated my family members. I recently had a big blow up with my family because I told them that I choose love and shunning is not loving. I was told that because I refuse to shun the DF person I am "ruining" the lesson that DF'ing is supposed to teach. I haven't stepped foot in a KH in more than 15 years - so why on earth would I shun someone who left? The craziness never ends. The whole family has turned on this DF relative - and have done some terrible things in the name of this religion.

  On the up side our non-jw family and the community that they live in have seen for themselves the hateful and hurtful nature of this. The JW's have given their own anti-witness to alot of people.
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  23

  Are You Comfortable With Who You Now Are?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  many jws are misfits and many that were raised as jws find it difficult to be "normal".

  are you comfortable with yourself at this point in time?.

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  just fine

  Absolutely! I was raised in it and left more than 15 years ago. The first few years were a little rough, now life gets better and better. Freedom is a wonderful thing. Once i made peace with the decision I had made the rest was easy. Once you find your balance to the point no one can shake you from it, the witnesses have no control.
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  30

  How many of you haven't fared too well since your exit?

  by i_drank_the_wine in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know that i've had a hard time piecing things back together after losing my wife and family a couple years ago and haven't really gotten the ball rolling to say the least.

  just curious to hear if anyone else is in the same boat, or was in the same boat and how long it took them to get a "new life" figured out and going..

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  just fine

  When I first left I was completely lost. I didn't know what to do with my new found freedom and I did party quite a bit that first year. Then I decided to join some other groups. I played volleyball on a league, joined a women's basketball team, played on the company softball team, volunteered at the animal shelter, and adopted a dog from the shelter. It all helped me to gain some balance and perspective. I went to college and got my degree. I have been out 13 years now and I'm in a good place. It'll happen........ just keep putting one foot in front of the other.
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  42

  Name Things That Are Unique To Jehovah's Witnesses

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  they are the only religion that i know of that disapprove of a college education.

  they alone believe in the significance of 1914. they exclusively believe that christ jesus is michael the archangel.....to name a few.. what can you add to the list?.

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  just fine

  They tear families apart in the name of Jehovah.

  Persons who disagree are labled crazy, demonized or both.
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  18

  Reaching a Significant Milestone

  by Quendi in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hello friends,.

  sunday, 4 september 2011 will go down as an important day in my spiritual journey.

  i had an extraordinary experience today that i feel compelled to share with all of you.

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  just fine

  I am glad you are finding acceptance and comfort. What a difference from what we all felt at the Hall.
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  22

  Another step in healing from the days as a JW

  by FlyingHighNow in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am bringing this over from the "still no pants suits, for sisters" thread.. it's funny how i don't think much about healing from the jw's anymore.

  i was not raised a jw.

  i was only active for around 10 years.

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  just fine

  When I look back now I can't believe the incredible journey life has become. The fear and bitterness gradually replaced by peace and confidence that I was making good choices on my own. When I first left I was afraid of everything, Armadgeddon, other witnesses finding out about my sins, etc.

  Two things I learned that apply to witnesses and any other persons in your life "other people only have as much control over you as you allow, and other people will only treat you as poorly as you allow them to." With that I could take back control of my life, decisions, and everything else - I realised it was all up to me and I didn't have to allow the Witnesses any place in my life.
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  22

  Another step in healing from the days as a JW

  by FlyingHighNow in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am bringing this over from the "still no pants suits, for sisters" thread.. it's funny how i don't think much about healing from the jw's anymore.

  i was not raised a jw.

  i was only active for around 10 years.

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  just fine

  It does fade in time. I have been out since 98 and I am happy, content and at peace with my life. Back then there was no peace I feel sorry for the sadness I see in my family's eye's (they are all still in). They are sad, tired, and lonely and I am the one at peace. It's all good........
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  49

  Was There Any Thread or Any Poster That Really Got You Thinking?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  there was a poster named jt that i'd read and relate to.

  he was very experienced and i very much respected his point of view.

  he left all the praise and authority he had because he simply knew it was all a crock.

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  just fine

  There were alot of different posters along the way that helped me through my transition to normal life. I think one of the most profound experiences was entertaining everyone else's point of view whether I agreed or not. When I was in the organization I felt as though even listening to a contary point of view was wrong. But "listening" to the posters here made me realize I didn't have to agree with anyone - just decide what I thought was best. I used to visit chat on a regular basis back then. I've been out for ten years now and still read this site often - although I don't post often.
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  42

  for "born-ins"

  by Mandette in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  does anyone remember being a little kid and being forced to sit through those 2 hour meetings?

  specifically being made to listen to graphic accounts of whatever country that was going through horrific persecution.

  (or any other horrors you might remember).

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  just fine

  Wow - I hadn't thought about any of this in a long time. I remember being sick with fear over the graphic details they would give about the torture techiniques, the one about having your fingernails pulled out and the bamboo shoots stuck with me. I lived in contstant fear when I was a child - if it wasn't Armageddon - it was displeasing Jehovah and ending up dead - or displeasing the elders and having your family taken away by disfellowshipping. It all seems so foreign now to me after having been out for 10 years.
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  37

  Apes prove male superiority

  by joelbear in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  within the great apes the male is always dominant.

  as they are the highest on the evolutionary track next to man i think it proves that males are supposed to dominate women in all aspects of life.

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  just fine

  Have you lost your mind?!?! Stereotyping male or female behavior is counterproductive for everyone involved. I am a woman who is guided by rational thoughts and not feelings. I am a member of senior management for the company I work for - and I am damn good at what I do. I don't think the patriarchy of the apes prove anything for humans. One would think humans as the more evolved species would have realized women are not better or worse than men - just different.